"Wives, Submit Yourselves unto Your Own Husbands"

So, the following actually wasn't intended to be a blog post (is that okay to say on your blog?!), but I liked the thoughts and have always felt strongly about this topic. In a class that I am taking the women were assigned a paper on the topic of Ephesians 5:22 and the men were assigned a paper on Ephesians 5:25. Because it is a paper rather than a blog post I wasn't able to add personal touches like I'd prefer and it's very structured, but that's okay! :) I hope you enjoy!

Women's Role in Marriage

            Marriage is something that many are involved in, but there are many different outcomes from each marriage. What makes one marriage better than another one? Why do some marriages end shortly after they begin in divorce while others last happily for 60 years? For some the answer is easy to see while for others they do not have the slightest idea. Although I am not married I think I know what makes one of the greatest differences in a marriage. Women desire love from their husbands while men desire respect from their wives. But, often times both men and women are too focused on themselves to give their spouse what they crave.

“Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord” (Ephesians 5:22). Submitting to the husband can bring great joy into a marriage. Submission allows a wife to give her husband the respect he desires. Many wives think that submission is optional in a marriage. Well, it is not optional.  “Wives, be in subjection to your own husbands” (1 Peter 3:1). “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord” (Colossians 3:18). As you can see, the Word of God makes many clear references to submitting to the husband. The verses do not say “if you feel like it, submit”, but they say “submit yourselves”. If women were to apply this to their marriage, I believe it would have a great affect.

God made women from Adams’ rib to be men’s’ companion (Malachi 2:14). While in the Garden of Eden, Adam looked around and saw no one there for him to help him. God put him to sleep and used his rib to form a woman who would become his help meet (Genesis 2:18-24). The term help meet is very important here. A help meet is exactly what it sounds like - a helper, not a leader or someone that is to make man’s life more difficult. Wives are to make their husband’s life easier by helping him along the way. Many wives will object because their husbands do not do as she suggests. “Once a wife has graciously and humbly expressed her heart on a matter, if her husband chooses to act contrary to her counsel, she must be willing to back off and trust God with the consequences of her husband’s decision” (DeMoss 147). A man will seek out his wife’s counsel, but he does make the ultimate decision as the head of his wife and family.

By this point many women can agree that though it may be difficult, they can submit to their husbands. However, there is more to the verse than “submit to your husband”. Ephesians 5:22 ends with “as unto the Lord.” This phrase means that we ought to submit to our husbands in the same way that we ought to submit to Christ. Because of this, we must respond out of joy. “The submission of a godly wife is more than a duty, it should be her heart’s delight” (Peace 131). Submitting out of joy may be difficult, especially when one thinks about how wives answer to the husband while the husband answers to no one. But that’s not the case. “The man is not excused. He is individually accountable to God. Because of the emphasis the Lord puts on marriage and the picturing of Christ by the husband, the burden of responsibility on his shoulders is a heavy one” (Jones 23-24). Wives need to help their husband carry this burden and help in whatever way possible. “If a man is to stand strong, whole, and undamaged, he must have his wife’s support" (Jones 56). A change of perspective may be needed here. It is not a burden to be the help meet of a man, but a privilege. A man has trusted his heart and his life to you. It is an honor to earn that respect and trust from a man.

A woman needs to be submissive to her husband. This allows her husband a greater opportunity to lead and become the man that God intends for him to be. The marriage will grow immensely when the wife is able to put her selfishness and pride away and care for her husband in the way that the Lord commands her. When a woman is submissive to her husband, she will discover a new kind of joy in that. Marriage will never be perfect in this sin-cursed world, but it can definitely be great when it is followed as closely to God’s intentions as possible.

*Photo Cred: Pinterest*